Joy

As a preemie mom, there is a tiny part of me that feels like the joy of Jossie's birth was stolen from me. When she took her first breath and made her first cry, I felt hopeless. I felt like I had failed her.

But in that moment of my life, I was never aware of the unexpected, new joys I would feel because of her early birth.

I saw daily the love and gentle care of the NICU nurses and doctors. I was overwhelmed with the support from my family and friends, whom I knew were always there for me but, man, they were REALLY there for me. I experienced Jeremy's and my marriage grow because of this new challenge.

And, practically speaking, spending three weeks in the NICU forced me to stop, sit and enjoy my newborn. If we had been at home, I know me, and I would have been still moving a mile a minute, taking care of Jack, the baby and the home.  But the NICU time forced me to sit with my girl and kangaroo care the bejeebers out of her, and I'm grateful for that quiet bonding time.

I'll never forget the tears of joy at Jossie's 5-month check-up at the pediatrician when we learned she was on the growth chart for her actual age.  Or watching her as a toddler, "reading" books and crossing her arms over her chubby belly when she gets fed up at Jack.

Today, my family experienced a lot of joy. We participated in our first-ever charity walk - the March for Babies walk. A few of our dearest Chicago friends walked with us, and we were overjoyed with our friends' and family's generosity, helping us to raise more than $1,000 for the March of Dimes. I'm a professional fundraiser, and this is the best money I've ever raised.

I'm thankful for my healthy babies as I saw families walking in memory of the little ones who didn't survive. And I was really impressed with the family who was walking in honor of their little one, born at 25 weeks this past February and thriving. They had their act together!

It was a privilege and honor to participate in today's walk, walking alongside thousands of other March of Dimes supporters. Thank you again for your love and support.

Ever after, continued

Yesterday, I received an email from one of my vendors at work - a port-o-potty company - inviting me to like them on the Facebook.

It's pretty safe to say that the glamour of the previous weekend has receded and my normal life is firmly back in place.

This week was crazy-pants. Meeting after meeting at work - I hate operating that way. I need a little space to organize and plan. I am not good at working on the fly. At home, I'm volunteering for Jack's preschool teachers' appreciation lunch; we're prepping for tomorrow's March of Dimes walk; and Jossie had her 15-month pediatrician appointment yesterday (25% for weigh and 50% for height - actual age, baby!).

Friday night was a welcomed respite - met with my besties for dinner. We first tried for the hip Ruxbin. Ruxbin does not take reservations and people line up at 5:30 p.m. to put their name on the list. I tried in vain, and I got a estimated time of 8:45 p.m. for our party of 3. This is too late for us mama girls, so we implemented a very nice plan B - a quiet dinner at West Town Tavern. It's one of my neighborhood favorites - a gracious atmosphere, seasonal dishes and well-priced glasses of wine.

This morning I managed a feat - while Jeremy took Jack out to run errands and Jossie girl napped, I took a lavender-scented bath - with candles, my new bath pillow and music. This was in between less-pampering activities like laundry and cleaning Roscoe's litter box, but any down moment is a good moment for this mama.

I'm grateful for the busy hum of Jeremy's and my family life, despite how tiring and chaotic it can be. I know someday I'll look back on these innocent early days - my toddler girl clinging to me at the pediatrician's office; my husband taking my preschooler for a junior baseball mitt for his first MLB game Tuesday night; and me planning yet another grocery list for the week ahead. It may not always be enchanting, but this life is mine.

And thank you for everyone who is supporting our walk tomorrow. We are overwhelmed with your generosity. Thank you.

Help us support the March of Dimes

Gentle readers, this weekend is the March for Babies walk in Chicago. Please help us to say thanks for the good care Jossie received as a preemie by making a gift of $5, $10, or $25 to our team. I'm thinking it will be pretty easy to hit our goal for Jack and Jossie - we're raising money for cute babies, for goodness sake. Next up, we'll be fundraising for puppies and rainbows.

And I'm bringing out the big guns.



Oh, honey, and I'm not done yet. Let's read Jossie's birth story too.

Thank you!